This is Chi.
I'm not online right now, but if you are looking for my work, please press 1.
Press 2 if you want to hear a bit more about me, in third-person.
Please press 3 to read some articles on me while you wait.
Press 4 to see me offline and IRL.
Press 5 to leave a message.
If you are looking for a representative, please say "representative."